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Her true self begins to emerge.

Back in December my boss Danny offered me a new position. The company that I worked for was one of the early leaders in the small computer business as we called it back in those days. They were opening stores that were computer only locations. Some were free standing and some were based out of a regular store. There was one opening in Easton and he offered me the manager's job there. Well manager was the title but I was going to be working by myself until the place started generating enough revenue to support other sales people. I had been very successful in selling computers from my stores and Danny felt that this where the real opportunity in the company was. I would start there the beginning of January. It was a little farther drive from the apartment where I was living at the time but it was fairly close to Katie's house. The thought that had Katie been still alive that I could have moved in with her crossed my mind with a great deal of sadness.

The job was tough for the first few months. I was in over my head, having not only to try and make sales but also to learn about things like word-processing, databases, spreadsheets, as well as accounting, which I knew absolutely nothing about. I knew that Danny would cut me a little slack until I got up to speed but at the same time the company was pushing hard to make these locations profitable in a short amount of time. Then in March, Danny left the company. He had always told us that once his company stock was worth a certain amount that he was going to go into business for himself and it happened. The new sales manager and I never got along well but by then I was started to generate enough business that he pretty much left me alone.
Unlike the regular store manager job, this was a 9:00 AM to 6:00 PM position. I had to work Saturday mornings as well but a lot of times I would stay later in the day while I was teaching myself about all these new things. But I had a lot more free time and well I still wasn't anywhere near being over losing Katie. To be honest, it was still as painful as it had been in the beginning. The visits with Elizabeth helped and so did being near Katie's spirit when I was there, but it wasn't the same has having her with me. A case of sixteen-ounce beers never lasted a week during that period.

One night early in January while I was sitting at the apartment remembering some of the things that we had done, I decided to start writing down everything that had taken place during those wonderful twelve months that we had been together. I just didn't want to lose all of those memories. So the next day I got a notebook, pack of paper, and couple of sets of tabbed dividers. I had still had a date book from 1981 and it had a 1980 calendar in the back as well. I made a page for each weekend or day that we had been together and then every night and free minute of time that I had, I would sit there and work on transferring all my memories of her to paper. A few were in a story format but mostly it was just notes as I remembered them. Some nights were easy to remember, some took a lot of thinking to get things right. If a page got too cluttered I would redo it so that it was more readable. There were a few things that I couldn't remember an exact date as to when they happened and I had a section for those as well. There was a clear plastic pocket on the inside of the front cover and in that I put the business card that Katie had written her home phone number on, the paper with the directions to her house, and the piece of receipt that Angie had written her phone number on.

Sounds like I was obsessed? That I was, but I also found that my mind worked better without having three or four beers to cloud it, so it helped in that respect. I didn't stop drinking but I limited myself to one or two beers a night or one beer and a shot from what was left of the bottles of good Scotch and Bourbon that she had gotten for me.

January 24th was a Sunday and I had been working on the notebook on and off all day.

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